Monday, October 3, 2011

River's Diary: Part Eight by Myownknight

The Dreams of Times not Past.

In my dreams I'm searching again, for that I've never lost. It's strange. Everything so familiar, but I've never seen it, I'm sure. its nice. no ones yelling, and I'm sure if I just turn around, I'll see my friends behind me. the ones I left behind. 

The ones I left behind in the cages when I flew. 
before they clipped my wings again.

oh Wôde mā.
______________________
Dumb Homosapiens.

Must tell them, but they never listen. Always looking for the words behind my meaning, never seeing what I'm saying. what's so hard about "there's chicks still in the hawks nest, but the sparrows won't fly away from them. one of their own, so they'll feed them, then flee to the mountains." ?
Stupid men, with their need for order and weddings. least the Cap'n knows somethings wrong, but course he seems to think its just bout us and poor Serenity. Guess that's the best I can get rights about now. Will just have to change course next time I fly.
For a genius, I am awfully predictable.

______________________
She's Not With You Anymore.

I live. 
I walk. Next to you, not with you, because it all matters now. Every little thing. 
I can see you. You are healthy. You sleep, and love, and eat, and walk. You walk straight into the trap. You are not Chosen.
I see Him. see his Choices He has no hope, he is of death. But he tries. And he fails. Less, than some, but still he tries. It's all he has. All he is.
Others try to change him.
They will fail.

_________________________
They're trying to change me.

Cap'n finally put me in charge of flying again tonight, while he and Zoe get some shut eye. Soon as his mind left the light, I got to turn us in the right direction. Now, while everyone but me and Serenity slumber, we're off, to save the golden harp, from some very mean giants.
I suppose I better lock the cockpit. Cap'n Daddy always does get so upset about changes of course. Now way to explain why, though. Just have to show them.
At least with Simon and Kaylee getting snuggly officially, I get to have Kay's room. still finding fascinating little screws, tools, and the occasional sock stuck hither thither and yawn.

______________________

Oh So Fussy.

Everybody started waking up, and there's such a hollering and fuss, Cap’n bellowing as to where the dickens are we, Simon trying to send me to sleep, and Jayne just wants ta shoot me. Didn’t believe me when I told them through the door, that I am of my fully functioning mental capacity as of this moment. Kaylee kinda believes me, but everybody else thinks it's Miranda all over again. Just two more days, and we’ll be there, and then they can fuss and try to turn around. I know Cap’n Daddy, once he see them he won’t be able to leave them behind.

You’d think at the minimum they’d thank me for spoofing our navsat signal, so as to appear as if we’re a freighter that’ll be passing our true destination right on by. Kaylee and Cap'n didn't even teach me that one. But nooooo, they just wanna get to their next job. Our family can be so short sighted sometime.

~River T.

___________________

Present and partially accounted for.

well, we're here. And I am currently locked in the pantry again, as if I couldn't get out if I wanted to. It's more of a courtesy, really, something to keep Jayne quiet with, and keep River out of the way as they tried to figure out where the hell we are. 
By now I can feel them discovering the notes I left in the cockpit, the drawing and stories half hiding the terrible truth of this place. I tried to be as clear as I could be, but my head cries when I remember too closely. Instead, I left them the tale of a little boy, who was captured by evil wizards, and locked in a dungeon with twelve other children. One of them, a beautiful princess, snuck into his cage at night and whispered beautiful stories about the world outside, and about her brother, the prince who would come and rescue them. But time passed, and the princess grew frighten and confused, and forgot what the sky looked like. And the little boy was left all alone, until he forgot too. And he fell under the Wizards power, and remains there too this day, dimly remembering the little girl's promise to rescue him one day.

I can feel myself remembering now. But I don't want to remember, and its easier to just tell the story of the little boy, and the lost princess who never really found herself again.

_____________________

Hellooo FFF! it's been quite awhile since I posted part seven, and I apologize for the wait. as always, you can find River on Tumblr, Facebook, and Twitter. And to sweeten the deal, the last entry in part eight won't be posted anywhere else until tomorrow afternoon, so you get to read it first!

Clear skies, and open borders, ~Ji.

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